Overcame PE in 200 Days - How you can do it too
Good evening, I'm a 23 years old (M), who had been suffering from PE for about 3 years now. I used to last around 30 seconds while masturbating, and less than a second during sex, and now can last for more than 20 minutes.
Similarly to a lot of people here, my PE came from watching unsanitary amounts of porn, and rushing to finish as quick as I could, even multiple times in a single session (could even come in 10 seconds if I wanted to, that shit was nuts).
I did realize at around 19 that this wasn't good, but didn't do anything about it : I would spend my days just playing video games and jerking off so nothing else really mattered. Now guess what, had sex for the first time at 18 and I came as soon as I put it in. Not my proudest moment.
Believe it or not, I never saw that girl again, and my confidence was very much wrecked. Thus, I decided to take matters in my own hands and looked up all information I could on the matter, especially on this subreddit. Had sex a few times recently and it went great. As stated previously, I can now have sex for more than 20-25 minutes, and survive handjobs and blowjobs with that. Anyone can get here, it's all in the head.
I'll now be listing all the remedies that I did : some worked, some didn't, so take all of my advice with a grain of salt, as everyone's mind/bodies won't react the same way to different treatments.
What helped me improve and what I recommend :
-Working out. Have a healthy mind in a healthy body. It doesn't matter if you're not killing yourself at the gym, bit at least have some form of physical activity. It boosts testosterone levels, helps you stay fit/healthy, and helps with sleep, energy levels etc... Don't miss out on that
-Reverse kegels. Almost every time possible. When at school, in public transport, when taking a piss, when showering, when masturbating. As you've probably read before, reverse kegels allow you to relax your pelvic muscles, which is key in learning to control your arousal/orgasm.
-Quitting porn. It's been said time and time again, but it messes up your brain darn bad. Believe it or not, even now, I can't last more than 1 minute with porn, despite being able to last for wayyy longer during sex. That's how much of a drug it is.
-Masturbating without orgasming. Orgasm only allowed every 7-10 days. Practice dissociating jerking off and orgasming. Sexual pleasure must come first, and orgasming is only a "bonus" you allow yourself once in a while, and should not be the objective. I would make these sessions last for at least 10 minutes at first, gradually increasing the time to 20, 30, 40 minutes...
-Deep breathing. Breathe in for 3 seconds, breathe out from your mouth for 3 seconds. Do it as much as possible, whenever possible, especially during your masturbating sessions.
-Consistency. Results won't magically appear if you're not consistent. However, don't worry if you skip sessions like once every week, it won't make you "lose" progress or anything.
-Mental visualization and focus. Focus on what you're doing when masturbating, and repeat yourself these words, like a self-hypnosis : "I'm in control, I feel nothing, I last forever". I would repeat these words all the time, and whenever I said them, I would calm down and remember my real objective, my goals, and to relax. When you feel like your arousal is building up, take deep breaths and relax. I like visualizing a valve releasing air pressure, and imagining my body on doing the same.
-Trojan numbing condoms. They work darn well and are a good confidence boost at first. Watch out, the cream does take about 2-3 minutes to take effect and lasts a quite a while. Good for a first-time confidence boost.
Adult toys. this will help you to control your speed, the tech dick help me much.
What didn't help :
-Kegels. They tightened my pelvic floor and made me tense in general
-Watching porn while practicing not to orgasm. Tried that for a few weeks and I saw 0 improvement. Even now qi still get overexited when watching porn so I totally quit. Get out of that place asap
-Durex numbing condoms. Trojan's were good but these are honestly crap, they're too small and the cream doesn't work. 0/10
-Edging and other masturbation techniques supposed to make you last longer. Edging didn't help and had quite the opposite effect. You're supposed to be able to stay far from orgasming, not keeping yourself at the brink of it. Other techniques simply did nothing
-Depression, whatever negative thoughts you have... Considering how deep-rooted porn can affect you, depression isn't unlikely to cause similar effects. See a psychologist if needed idk, but work on curing that.
Aaand that's about it. Feel free to ask any questions or anything, I'll be glad to answer. I know you've probably heard these tips before, but this sub is lacking of success stories at times, so I thought I'd share mine !
Please remember this too : unless you were BORN with PE, you can and will be able to cure it. There is no mental process that can't be reversed, if you put effort into it, trust me.
Peace, good luck to everyone, we'll all gonna make it brahs.
Men, do NOT apologize for orgasming "too soon" during sex. You were enjoying yourself! and you still have fingers!
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